World's shortest quest

My two favorite foods are probably carrots and eggs because I don’t have to buy a special version of them, no matter what kind you buy they never have gluten and so they won't ever kill me or even make me sick.

Some things are hard or impossible to make gluten free - mostly pastries and bagels, and some things would probably be easy but no one does it - like Pop Tarts and Cheerios. And then some things are so easy apparently, that there are tons of them. Like Oreos. 

There are at least a thousand (or three that I can think of) brands of gluten-free Oreos and all of them get incredible reviews. The incredible review is: “They taste just like Oreos.” 

Sometimes I buy them because I think there might be a brand I haven’t had yet that will taste just like Oreos, sometimes I think maybe my life is actually a quest to find a really great wheat-free chocolate sandwich cookie and I start to think about the songs they will write about me and so I buy a lot of different types of these Oreos and recently I realized some bad news, I don’t think it’s the rice or quinoa or potato or whatever weird flour they’re putting in that’s the problem. I think I might not like Oreos.

The best thing about Oreos, even gluten-free ones is you can take them apart and build your own real Double-Stuf® Oreos, and the best thing about being an adult is you can just throw your Double-Stuf® Oreo in the trash, no one is going to make you eat it. 

The best thing about being a rich adult is you can throw it in the garbage disposal.