Super powers

The second-worst thing about Whole Foods is how expensive it is, and the worst thing about Whole Foods is that they don’t have express checkout. You have to have an interaction with another human being every time you shop there. 

I always choose the cashier that looks completely unfamiliar so that I never go to the same one twice. This seemed like a perfect system until this morning, when my cashier said “Oh, you’re switching to a different type of yogurt” and I realized in one sickening moment that it’s not a new cashier every time, it’s a man with the most forgettable face in the world and I’ve been checking out with the same guy every single visit for the last three years.

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